Hello… again.

Hi, Hello, How are you? Hugs from 6 feet apart… I miss you all. It has been a moment and so much has changed. I took some time away without a story, a post or an email about what happened and that was hard. There was this feeling to want to be on social media, or post a new design but I just couldn’t. However, I did keep a journal and that was my space and refuge to draw, write, collage and to keep designing with no apologies or regrets. That time was and is sacred.

My husband kept telling me, “Make your mess a message”… and he would push me to come back but it was hard. Then, 2020 hit and everything completely changed, just when I was about to come back and relaunch my business early this year. In April of 2020, things got harder, I was diagnosed with a spinal injury and was bed bound for over 3 months. During that time, it took an emotional turn with Black Lives Matter, my fear of the pandemic and not being able to feel because I was experiencing physical and emotional pain. The night before my surgery, I hit a breaking point and I just cried my heart out to my husband like a little girl. I was terrified not only for the black men in my life but for all of us, because it just felt too much. What I did need that night was a good cry because my cries for months were of my personal physical pain but the pain I experienced this night ran deep in my heart.

“I am a daughter of 400 tears, be careful”.

I heard that quote somewhere and I wish I had the name of the person who said it, because it’s so true. I then knew, I wanted to create JOY in my life and the journal I kept filled with my words and sketches became the stepping stone. I started doing more embroidery again while laying on my stomach for hours and just found peace in fiber. I drew and sketch and found my pages to be a space that I wanted to share. I then knew what I wanted to do and how to express myself artistically.

I also found meditation in writing and scripting, so using my modern calligraphy and design, I played around with words. I started to look at how could I create JOY around me and that’s when I found this new found love for custom decor and apparel. I’m excited to start this journey and what better time then for the holidays, safely. I will share more through this section of my website and hope this new journey inspire others. Talk to you soon.

Ayana b.